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Table of Contents
 Foreword, iii
 About the people who created this book, ix
 The miracle of organ donation, x
 Chapter One Little Angels, 13
 Chapter Two Great-Grandmother Grace's Stories, 27
 Chapter Three Spoonerism, Malapropism and Word Play, 33
 Chapter Four Serving Up Smiles, 39
 Chapter Five Kids At Work, 45
 Chapter Six Kids At Play, 49
 Chapter Seven The Most Important Thing Is Her Smile, 53
 Chapter Eight That's My Boy! 55
 Chapter Nine The World According To Kids, 61
 Chapter 10 And The Band Played On, 69
 Chapter 11 Bathroom Humor, 75
 Chapter 12 Dressing For Success, 83
 Chapter 13 Kids and the Birds and the Bees, 85
 Chapter 14 Kids and Marriage, 93
 Chapter 15 Teaching About Money Takes All the Cents You Have, 99
 Chapter 16 There's No Such Thing As A Foolish Question, 101
 Chapter 17 When Mum's The Word For An Aspiring Singer, 105
 Chapter 18 Potpourri, 107
 Chapter 19 The First Day of School, 113
 Chapter 20 Two Boys and a Picture, 115
 Chapter 21 To Grandparents' House We Go, 119
 Chapter 22 Little Elves (Christmas Stories), 125
 Chapter 23 A Homemaker Is Priceless, 131
 Our Family Stories, 139

Chapter 11: Bathroom Humor

Potty training is one of the least favorite aspects of parenthood. The best way to get through potty training is to look for the humor in it. One mother remembers the first time her son went into the men's restroom on his own. She thought everything was fine, until she heard a call that echoed through the restaurant, "Mommy, come and wipe me off!"

With little modesty and lots of pride in their potty training adventure, children don't think twice about using potty-related words, no matter what the situation.

A urologist, Dr. Nancy Hockley works long hours. One night she came home absolutely exhausted. Sarah, 4, ran to her mother demanding attention, but Nancy was too tired to respond.

"Your mother's poped," Norman said.

Where?!" Sarah asked with amazement, looking over her shoulder.
Ron was watching TV when a commercial came on advertising taking schooling at home. "Act now," the actress urged. Her voice rose. "Begin training at once in your home for one of these careers."

"Quit saying that," Ron said, his voice rising, too. "I AM trained. I can go to the bathroom myself!"
When George and his son Michael, 2, were at Grandma Haynes' house, George needed to use the restroom. Shortly after George entered the bathroom, Michael started knocking on the door, asking to be let in.

"I'll be out in a minute," George replied.

After knocking three times and hearing the same reply, Michael said, "I'll blow your house down!"
Jess was visiting his grandmother, Mrs. Jansen. He had just gotten out of diapers. One day she heard a knock on the bathroom door.

"Are you in there, Grandma?"

"Yes, Jess."

"Are you standing up or sitting down?"
Amanda, 5, checked with her mother before going to the restaurant restroom. Assured that she should use the restroom with the most letters on the door or the one with a dress shape, she confidently left.

But a few minutes later she came back. Her distraught voice announced to all, "I can't go. It's chickens!"
The Cripes had been redecorating their bathroom. Jessica Allyson, 3, walked in and looked at the bare black floor with all the linoleum scraped off.

"Where did the OTHER bathroom go?" she asked.
Lucy, 9, was telling her mother about how much fun her younger brothers were having playing in the bathtub.

You can tell I'm getting older," Lucy said. "I get BORED when I take my bath."
Ingrid was giving her new baby Seth a bath, under the watchful eyes of older brother Jamie, 6.

When Ingrid brushed Seth's hair, some cradle cap was noticeable.

"What's chipping away his head?!" Jamie asked in alarm.
Erin, 2, was being potty trained. After she was done going potty, she asked her mother, "Mommy, can you sweep my bottom?"
Deb Cooper was getting ready to wash and wax her kitchen floor. She told her three boys to use the bathroom, because they couldn't come back through the kitchen until the floor was dry.

That night the Cooper family webt for a ride with their grandparents. They passed a house with a port-a-potty in their front yard.

"I wonder why they have a port-a-potty in their front yard," Deb said.

"Do you suppose their mom is mopping the floor?" Cory, 10, asked.
Jon was driving with his son Ethan, 3. Out of the blue, Ethan asked, "Dad, do you know what?"

"No, what?"

"We are people because we can see and poop!" Ethan announced.
Shawn, 3, was finally having success with potty training, so his parents were continually telling him how proud they were of him for using "the big potty."

One day Shawn saw his father come out of the restroom. Shawn came running to him and hugged his legs.

"I'm so proud of you!" he told his dad. "You went potty on the big potty!"
A family was watching the movie "Schindler's List" which is nearly siz hours long. At one point in the movie the back of a man who is urinating is shown. The family's daughters were shocked by the scene.

But the family's little boy was not surprised or shocked. He told his sisters, "It's a long movie. He had to go sometime."
The Herricks' neighbors were fertilizing the garden with manure. The boys begged to go out and watch the neighbor unload the dump truck. Sue told them they could go outside if they stayed out of the way. But the boys were soon back in the house. Sue asked them why they didn't stay out longer.

"Someone passed some really bad gas!" Matt said.